On my way back from my short hiatus, I ran into our next Iconic Convos interviewees, Hat n’ Boots at Oxbow Park in Georgetown. At 22-feet high (Boots) and 44-feet wide (Hat), these two are hard to ignore.

Nicole Bearden (NB): Hello, and welcome to another Iconic Convo with Seattle’s most recognizable icons. Today we are speaking with the Fremont Troll. We appreciate you spending time with us today, Fremont Troll. 

Fremont Troll (FT): Grunts, and nods slowly as dust drifts from his head to float through the air

NB: Now, you’ve been around since 1990. How have you noticed that the city has changed over the past 35 years?

NB: A few weeks ago, I had the pleasure of chatting with Pike Place Market. During our talk, Pike Place spoke briefly about their friend The Gum Wall. Now that we are clear of the market’s holiday hustle and bustle, Gum Wall has made time to connect with us and share some secrets. Welcome, Gum Wall, and thank you for speaking with us today.

Nicole Bearden: Zdravstvuyte, today we are speaking with the Fremont Lenin statue. (I don’t speak Russian, but I learned the phrase for “hello”, just for today).

Lenin Statue: Hello. I do not speak Russian.

NB: Aren’t you a Lenin statue? I thought Lenin was Russian?

LS: Lenin was Russian. My nationality is more complicated. I was created by a Bulgarian, for Czechoslovakia, and have now been in the Capitalist States of America since the ‘90s. What is nationality anyway? What are borders, but arbitrary lines assigned to take power from the many and funnel it to the wealthy?

BS: The more people change, the more they remain the same. People, seasons, time—they all cycle, they all come back to incipience.

I bear witness to the spinning wheels of time, the turning clock of seasons, and the joys and sorrows of man—I bear it all and it is both a heavy burden, and a lightsome ecstasy. 

A trio of squirrels playing tag in my tree friends' branches. The cries of a woman brought to regret by a loathsome monster. And in between are the mediocre events, such as life and death which keep us turning—I see all.

NB: Thank you so much for agreeing to this interview, Mr. Kraken. I think a lot of people were confused when the Seattle Kraken’s mascot turned out to be…not a Kraken. Can you give us the inside scoop?

BK: Call me Brodie. Mr. Kraken is my dad and he's a huge bummer. I’m so stoked to get a chance to set the record straight, man. It’s been heavy since that little troll weirdo got picked over me.

Iconic Convos brings a lighthearted twist to celebrity interviews by conceiving imaginary chats with Seattle's most famous non-human icons.

Nicole Bearden: Before we begin, I would like to thank you, Pike Place, for finding time to speak with me today. I know how busy you are—you never get a day off!

Pike Place Market: Haha, that's right! But I am happy to have the chance to speak on my own behalf for once, and perhaps set the record straight on a few things.